Believing in yourself is step ZERO
How far could you go if you wholeheartedly believed in yourself?
People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within." --Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
I dIDn’T really believe in myself…..
This might come as a surprise to you…. I seldom believe in myself. Whether it is in the form of artistic ability or the ability to talk to someone at a club. There has been few times where I entered any situation by saying “I can do this”
I will tell you though that this wasn't revealed to me until my mom pointed it out one day. I was telling her about a client presentation that I was really nervous about.
“ I don't know if they're going to like the work”
“I'm worried they’re going to hate me”
My mom paused and said
“Brayan, you have to start believing in yourself more!”
It wasn't until that moment that I realized how much I actually don't believe in myself. Mind you it is taking a lot of courage to tell you this right now.
There is a lot of shame around the fact that so many people believe in me, yet somehow I don’t?
I hope I'm not alone in saying that my inner critic is a nasty POS that loves to tell me everyone hates me and no one likes my work. They are constantly working off of a scarcity mindset and only reminding myself of my past ‘failures’
It is a primal urge to only think of the negative. Our ancestors were hunted by sabertooth tigers. Give yourself some grace, we all do it!
Well, that changes today!
Or maybe it has already started to change! After my mom said that a couple of weeks ago I had to sit down with myself and really start to shift my mindset on the story I tell myself on confidence and believing in myself. I realized that I was the only one not believing in myself. I felt gross in that fact but I make a commitment to myself that I will wholeheartedly believe in everything I do moving forward.
"Argue for your limitations and, sure enough, they're yours." --Richard Bach
Reasons and ways to believe in yourself more!
You should be your biggest cheerleader!
No cap, no bs, no lie! You should be your biggest supporter. First of all, because you know that you will always be there for yourself. People change, social media and technology advances but you will always be there for YOU!
That is step one. It may be cliche to say but it truly does start from within.
Why should anyone else believe in you?
This is some tough love that I also need to hear! Yes, why should anyone else believe in you? Now, I don't say this to be mean, I say this to encourage you to reflect on why people speak so highly of you! YES, people speak highly of you.
For a really long time, I told myself
“I wish I could see what people see in me” and then I started seeing it!
I convinced myself that people were just being nice about my art. When in reality it doesn't matter what they thought of my art, what mattered was that they saw the long-term dedication and impact I was trying to create. Even if I didn't.
Most of the time people don't tell you how they feel about your work (any kind of work) They are commenting about how you make them feel, how you inspire them for following your dreams, for being dedicated.
Believe it or not but few people are actually dedicated to anything wholeheartedly.
“The “what-ifs” will torment you. The “oh, well” will free you.”
― russ, It's All in Your Head
Look at your own evidence
How many of you could relate when I was talking about client work? I think all artists and designers go through that right? Look behind you (metaphorically) how many raving reviews have you gotten? How many DM’s have you gotten from people saying “This is amazing work” “ i needed to hear this today” or anything like that?
We really forget about all the positive moments in our creative work only because our inner critic loves to focus on the negative!
One great way to start proving this to yourself is to start writing down a “win” List. Every time you get a W, big or small, write it down! Every time you get down or don't believe in yourself, look at your own evidence!
You prove to yourself over and over that you are a baddie, a worthy person, and someone who people look up to!
Fear is the mind-killer
If you think about it fear is at the root of this whole belief problem. Fear of losing your reputation. Fear of losing your audience. Fear of the unknown. Fear will drive you insane…
Fear of proving to your inner critic that they were right. You ain’t shit.
“Fear is the wall. Belief is what catapults you over the wall.”
― Russ, It's All in Your Head
I'm here to tell you that a lot of people have those same fears. Those fears are irrational and truly a lot of those things don't happen overnight if they do! Those fears will be there so why not just believe in yourself anyway? Why not push those down and say
“You will be there as much as I am here believing in myself”
LIke Russ said, Believing in yourself is the catapult that throws you over the wall of fear!
This is a process, give yourself some grace!
Trust me this isn't something that changes overnight! There will be days where you don't believe in yourself and there will be days that you think you're at the top of the world. Take it slow and remember the points above!
You got this! :)
Colorful takeaways!
Be your number one fan! People and platforms can be temporary
Confidence and Belief is contagious!
Make a wins list, you are more of a badass than you think!
Fear is at the root, be afraid and say fuck it.
Take it slow! Belief is a muscle we're working out.
As always Peace Love and YAMZ aka Brayan!
